Poem: widow’s window

widow’s window

My husband has died
a casket applied
with fire collide
death’s mist satisfied.

Thoughts of him brew
they cook and they stew
rains came and storms blew
for years these I knew.

One morning a sun
warm days now begun
life’s strings I can strum
my heart starts to hum.

Betrothed no more
stand at the door
feet on the floor
light shines afore.

My soul feels him still
and wants with a will
that marches the drill
of love’s easy thrill.

But now is my time
the present is mine
a future is prime
and all comes out fine.

(9/21/10)

My husband died from an aortic dissection at a young age (the inner wall of the artery over his heart broke), and every September on the pier at sunrise I write at least one letter to him in my journals on my life so far. In 2010 I wrote letter after letter until this, my first poem, came on the 8th anniversary. I felt like the poem did not come from me, but wrote itself. I get the feeling of marching when I read it.

Richard Bullock Jr. (12/13/54 to 9/12/02)

Mindfulness & Cognitive Restructuring Exercises

Cognitive Restructuring Exercises to Improve Your Mood and Reduce Stress

Alice Boyes

Jon Kabat-Zinn

How Cognitive Behavior Change improves my quality of life.

I have had many different experiences with different mental health therapies.  Within CBT (cognitive behavior therapy) is something called Mindfulness.  By far it has been the most helpful method for retraining my mind.

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